Eden It Isn't

Can the dust bunny war be far behind?
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It's a wonder anything survives in my house. I don't cook. When my ex moved out, he took the kitchen stuff. It took me a year to notice.

I also suck at cleaning. Unlike the vacuum that doesn't (suck). And as for a green thumb.. well let's just say my thumb color would be found on the opposite side of any color wheel shade of green.

But for some reason, every spring and fall I come under the delusion that this is the season that I will buy shrubs and flowers, plant them, and my yard of nothingness will be transformed into a flowering, green, lush garden of Eden.

I dream that the bushes will not turn brown and crispy, the trees will actually sprout leaves and the flowers will bloom and thrive. Well maybe not thrive, but at least live and stay green for more than a month. I've bought azaleas and planted them at the front of the house. I'm not exactly sure what happened to them. I only know that brown was not the color I bought.

Then there was the year of the lovely rose bushes I planted along the side of the house. Their pink blossoms lovely against the stark tan side of my house. Imagine my surprise when a week later I went to gaze proudly at them again and they were gone. No green leaves, no pink flowers, not even brown stalks were left. Poof. Gone.

On further investigation it revealed a son mowed them down. "I didn't notice them" the child said. "Besides, they would just die a slow death anyway. I just put them out of their misery." Unfortunately the little smart ass was probably right and I decided to give up on my Garden of Eden vision....Until.....

.....Lowes had a plant sale last month. When I had the kids come out and unload the plants from the Jeep, one son had the audacity to hum the 'funeral march' song as he carried the plants to the back yard.

HA! It's been over a month....Take this kids!

I’m tickled pink and yellow! I planted: Confederate Jasmine, Wysteria, Bougainvillea, Honeysuckle, sumthin sumthin (hey I’m new to this), two Italian cyprus trees, and only 1 plant out of 15 died. They are all climbing vines and I hope that one day they will completely take over the lattice and create a wall of flowers along the fence. Well, that’s the plan anyway. As the guys so nicely pointed out... We'vestill got a lot of summer to go.. and then there's *gasp* winter. Winter?!! Blasphemy! !